Re: Problems Installing Wife1.0.....+ Problems Installing and using Husband

From: . (.....)
Date: 09/15/03 

Date: Mon, 15 Sep 2003 18:10:03 +0430

Well , I have sth for you buddy!(Why do you hate yours?)

Installing Husband ver1.0

------------------------------------

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0
and noticed a slow down in the performance of flower
and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly
under Boyfriend 5.0

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other
valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9, but installed
undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6
simply crashes the system. I've tried running NAGGING
5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I
do?

Desperate

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<Reply>

Dear Desperate,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment
package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try to enter the command: C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME in the run menu and
install Tears 6.2.

 Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilty 3.0 and
Flowers 7.0.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence
2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Television 6.1. Television 6.1 is a very bad program
that will create Loud noises ( WAV files) and does not get deleted.

DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program.
These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve performance. I
personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Cheerfulness 2.0.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

"BriNan" <daiglen@nbnet.nb.ca> wrote in message
news:uc59b.10378$Ej.1479050@ursa-nb00s0.nbnet.nb.ca...
> You guys think you have problems! I installed Husband 1.0 now my comp
> won't even boot up.. All it does is sit there and fart :-(
>
> Silent Assassin wrote:
> > Try using McAfee 8.0 . An all-in-wonder new brand anti-antivirus
> > program that suck porn and cocks during its updates
> > (Did you really know that?)
> >
> > Then use the new installed viruses and overwrite wife1.0's
> > empty system files with the new .cum files!
> >
> > .cum is a new file system , created by G-spot ver 2002 ,
> > and is used to lubricate your system flow and increase your computer's
> > performance.
> >
> > (Warning: Once you have changed your file system from NTFS(No Tear For
Suck)
> > to CUM(Cocks Under Microsoft), there is no way you return to the
previous
> > system state. The only way is to overburn your wife 1.0's necessary
> > hotfixes and use or your re-enable your firewall to keep the wife
Trojans
> > out
> > of home)
> >
> > Hope this Help
> >
> >
> > ----
> > Tear me , Tear you!
> >
> > http://dts-l.org/goodpost.htm
> > http://www.catb.org/~esr/faqs/smart-questions.html
> >
> > You can have wife. Or you can have pleasure. Don't ever count on
> > having both at once. -- RAHAHA1
> >
> > --------------------------
> >
> > <info@fbi.org> wrote in message
> > news:eOUVbSneDHA.560@tk2msftngp13.phx.gbl...
> >
> >>To: Tech Support
> >>
> >>Dear Sir,
> >>
> >>Last year I upgraded my system from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and
noticed
> >>that the new program began creating problems within the system
processing
> >>and that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
> >>
> >>Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during
> >
> > system
> >
> >>initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
> >>
> >>Applications such as Poker Night 2.3, Girlfriend 3.2 and Saturday
> >
> > Football
> >
> >>5.0 no longer run, crashing the entire system whenever selected :(
> >>
> >>I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while running my other
> >>favorite applications. Whichever module or software I enter, only Wife
1.0
> >>seems to run and nothing else.
> >>
> >>I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall from
> >>Wife 1.0 to Girlfriend 7.0 does not work on this program. Can you help
me,
> >>please!!!
> >>
> >>
> >>Thanks,
> >>Rajeev
> >>
> >>
> >>
>
>>--------------------------------------------------------------------------
> >>
> >>Reply
> >>
> >>To: Rajeev
> >>
> >>
> >>Dear Rajeev,
> >>
> >>
> >>This is a very common problem men users of the Wife 1.0 software
complain
> >>about but it is mostly due to a primary misconception of the software.
> >>
> >>Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife
> >
> > 1.0
> >
> >>is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program.
> >>
> >>Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run
> >>everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still
> >>convert back to Girlfriend 7.0.
> >>
> >> Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to
> >>emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall,
> >>delete, or purge the program files from the system once installed !!
> >>
> >>You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to
> >
> > do
> >
> >>this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up
> >
> > with
> >
> >>more problems than the original system. Look in your manual under
> >
> > "Worries
> >
> >>Invited For Ever (Wife 1.0)".
> >>
> >>I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having
> >
> > Wife
> >
> >>1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section
> >>regarding general partnership faults (GPFs).
> >>
> >>You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might
> >
> > occur,
> >
> >>regardless of their cause. The best course of action to solve this major
> >
> > IT
> >
> >>problem of yours will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.
> >>
> >> In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because ultimately you
> >
> > will
> >
> >>have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will
return
> >>to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame
for
> >>all the GPFs.
> >>
> >>Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.
> >>
> >>Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife
> >
> > 1.0.
> >
> >>I recommend you to install the latest gift software like Flowers 2.1,
> >>Necklaces 3.2, and Chocolates 5.0.
> >>
> >>note: Do not under any circumstances, install Secretary With Skirt
3.3.
> >>This is not a supported application; in fact it is a deadly virus for
Wife
> >>1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
> >>
> >>
> >>regards,
> >>
> >>Amit
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>----
> >>Hope you had fun and a minute OUT of digits world.
> >>
> >>"Try to get back to nature" ;)
> >>
> >>
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