Re: Problems Installing Wife1.0.....

From: Pat Garard (garard_at_bigpond.net.au)
Date: 09/14/03 

Date: Sun, 14 Sep 2003 18:25:40 +1000

I can see that you have NO IDEA of the real problem from your Subject -
"Problems Installing Wife 1.0........"!!

Wife 1.0 is clearly already installed, and has equally clearly taken over
the following features of Xp:
AutoRun (YOUR shortcuts work only for HER)
Permissions (You have none)
Rights (You have none)
Compression (Flat Wallet)
Memory Management (YOU know NOTHING! I remember when ...)
Resource allocation (All gone)
Priority scheduling (You don't have any)
Networking (You dont have any)
TCP/IP (Talk Control Protocol/Income Protocol)
Outlook (Gloomy)
Word (try getting one in edgeways)
Access (Minimal)
Powerpoint (Your only negotiable asset!)
Office (Try the Garage)
and
MORE........................................................................
........

You MUST have known (Didn't your best friend tell you?) that Wife 1.0 is an
expensive, self-installing, multi-pipelined, parasitic, self-replicating,
resource and priority hungry Application that makes a WORM look like The
Arch Angel Gabriel!!

I strongly urge you to consider using Powerpoint's "Pack & Go" feature!

BEFORE ITS TOOOO LATEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

-- 
I Wish I could HELP!
Pat Garard
(In Tears)
Australia
"Bill" <info@fbi.org> wrote in message
news:eOUVbSneDHA.560@tk2msftngp13.phx.gbl...
> To: Tech Support
>
> Dear Sir,
>
> Last year I upgraded my system from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed
> that the new program began creating problems within the system processing
> and that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
>
> Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during
system
> initialization, where it monitors all other system activity.
>
> Applications such as Poker Night 2.3,  Girlfriend 3.2 and Saturday
Football
> 5.0 no longer run, crashing the entire system whenever selected  :(
>
> I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while running my other
> favorite applications. Whichever module or software I enter, only Wife 1.0
> seems to run and nothing else.
>
> I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall from
> Wife 1.0 to Girlfriend 7.0 does not work on this program. Can you help me,
> please!!!
>
>
> Thanks,
> Rajeev
>
>
>
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> Reply
>
> To: Rajeev
>
>
> Dear  Rajeev,
>
>
> This is a very common problem men users of the Wife 1.0 software complain
> about but it is mostly due to a primary misconception of the software.
>
> Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife
1.0
> is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program.
>
> Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run
> everything. It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still
> convert back to Girlfriend 7.0.
>
>  Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to
> emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall,
> delete, or purge the program files from the system once  installed !!
>
> You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to
do
> this. Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up
with
> more problems than the original system.  Look in your manual under
"Worries
> Invited For Ever (Wife 1.0)".
>
> I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation. Having
Wife
> 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section
> regarding general partnership faults (GPFs).
>
> You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that might
occur,
> regardless of their cause. The best course of action to solve this major
IT
> problem of yours will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE.
>
>  In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because ultimately you
will
> have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return
> to normal. The system will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for
> all the GPFs.
>
> Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high maintenance.
>
> Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife
1.0.
> I recommend you to install the latest gift software like Flowers 2.1,
> Necklaces 3.2, and Chocolates 5.0.
>
> note: Do not  under any circumstances, install Secretary With  Skirt 3.3.
> This is not a supported application; in fact it is a deadly virus for Wife
> 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.
>
>
> regards,
>
> Amit
>
>
>
>
>
>
> ----
> Hope you had fun and a minute OUT of digits world.
>
> "Try to get back to nature" ;)
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
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>
>
>
>

Relevant Pages

  • (OT) Why cant women come up with new jokes?
    ... I can spot a womcon joke like this one a mile away. ... DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law ... INSTALLING A WIFE 1.0 ... Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed ...
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  • A Funny Joke- Off Topic but not Really
    ... Last year, I upgraded my GirlFriend 5.0 to GirlFriend 5.1, which ... Wife 1.0 must be running before I can do ANYTHING. ... no uninstall feature for these plug-ins. ... will refuse to install, claiming insufficient resources. ...
    (microsoft.public.security)
  • Re: Whats your favorite 2-player game?
    ... Last year a friend of mine upgraded GirlFriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and found ... An install shield feature that allows Wife 2.0 to be ... this is a long standing bug which I should have been aware of. ...
    (alt.games.mame)
  • Re: Problems Installing Wife1.0.....
    ... The only way is to overburn your wife 1.0's necessary ... > Last year I upgraded my system from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed> that the new program began creating problems within the system processing> and that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. ... Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with> more problems than the original system. ... > In any case avoid excessive use of the Esc key because ultimately you will> have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return> to normal. ...
    (microsoft.public.windowsxp.security_admin)