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To: firewall-wizards@honor.icsalabs.com
Date: Tue, 26 Aug 2003 17:24:48 -0400 (EDT)

[I'll probably get killed for this, but hey... Rather than approving the
links to the company press releases that are in the queue, this'll have to
do. Paul]

TruSecure/ICSA Labs Misses Cat, Aquires Owner

Herndon, Virginia

TruSecure Corporation, parent of independent security product
certification division ICSA Labs announced today the acquisition of cat
owner Marcus Ranum.

While the full details of the agreement are not public, it was disclosed
that ICSA Labs will at long last gain access to Marcus's fabled "cat who
could certify firewalls." ICSA's efforts to procure the cat date back to
1996 when Mr. Ranum disclosed its amazing abilities in a post to the
then-popular Great-Circle firewalls mailing list. "I took a lot of heat
onthe list for trying to recruit that cat," said TruSecure's Jon McCown,
"but the potential was just too great to ignore." Though the feline in
question is now semi-retired, (he/she) is still reputed to be one of the
top five proxy firewall experts in the security community.

"Well, we can't always get the first round pick, but at least the one we
got can use the computer kind of mouse!" said Jon Mccown, who let
news of the initial negotiations leak in 1996.

"Do you think he's gonna want his list back?" asked a nervous Paul
Robertson, currently moderator of the Firewall-Wizards mailing list.

An unnamed rubber chicken was said to be considering a career change to
WMD detection based upon rumor or the cat's employment.

Marcus' cat was quoted as saying "Mrrrrow."

Paul
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Paul D. Robertson "My statements in this message are personal opinions
proberts@patriot.net which may have no basis whatsoever in fact."
probertson@trusecure.com Director of Risk Assessment TruSecure Corporation

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